Wine a little, you'll feel better!

I. Love. Wine.

Yet again, who doesn't? For those of you who aren't quite sure what the big whoop is, here you go! Oh, and it has mom written all over it!

1. It takes one for the team.

Now whether it's your kids, your boss, or your partner that has made you unsure if your hair feels better on your head or in a tightly clenched fist,  take your frustration out on that wine bottle ladies! A few simple steps and the 'momster' will return back to the depths of sleep deprivation. 

     Step 1: Remove hair from fists. We all know hair grows back but if post-partum hair loss and growth has taught me anything it's that 'ain't nobody got time for that'.  Also, waking up with a lion mane of curly short hair around your hairline is only going to fuel the Momster within.

     Step 2: Scramble like a mad woman for your wine opener that your toddler most likely put in safe keeping for you since you managed to grab the last bottle on earth that actually has a cork. This sometimes means digging through your garbage. There is all kinds of goodies in there.

     Step 3: Try and locate your wine glass. They are most likely dirty or broken but no one here is judging your newly appointed character plastic stemless wine glass. I promise.

     Step 4: Put your kid(s) back to bed.

     Step 5: If you haven't already, change into some yoga pants or Pjs. You can also skip this step by staying in them all day.

     Step 6: Enjoy. You should also note that you don't have to share it and that you have all the right to death glare anyone who goes near it.

2. It comes with the lifestyle.

What other drink pairs so well with our lifestyle of yoga pants and messy hair? I feel confident enough that I won't look like a hobo at the end of the night, the house a mess, in sweatpants, and desperately needing a shower with a glass of wine in hand.

3. It can be considered another family member, what's one more, anyways?

It sometimes joins you at dinner, just like your partner, kids, relatives...it might even be the only one who makes an appearance...cold dinner anyone? It has also been known to make appearances at family get togethers, graduations, birthdays, game nights, bbq's, and Tuesdays.

4. It's a well written personal ad.

We all know finding mom friends is like dating. Whether it's a typical play date pick up or mom facebook chat group dating, nothing is worse than trying to find things in common and not feel judged. Wino moms. It's a thing. If we flaunt it, it naturally attracts other moms we might be interested in. Mom-friend dating is hard, this helps weed out the field.

5. You don't have to share.

As mentioned before, you have all the right to bring out your best death glare towards anyone who nears it. As parents we share everything. Body parts, clothes, food, beds, baths, your soul, drinks, dessert, bodily fluids, time, going to the bathroom, chores (which is more like the opposite...UNfolding laundry). This one is yours. You don't have to share and kids can't have it.

6. It's a reason to get together with the girls.

You don't always have time to get together with all your friends. Specially if they are not "mom" friends. You have more of a chance of having a conversation that isn't based around what your kids poop looked like today with your friends without children if you have wine to talk about. By the time the wine conversation is over it won't matter anyways, you will be preoccupied with 90's music ans Taylor Swift Karaoke.

7. Just Because.

8. It makes certain gatherings and situations bearable. 

You are less likely to be judged in these scenarios than if you were slamming tequila shots. Nothing makes a gathering more awkward when you end up with less clothes on and have gone for more naps than your baby/toddler on their worst of days.

9. It's classy and I need to be reminded of my class even though I'm not sure when I had my last shower, there are questionable stains on my clothing, and I no longer have any sort of filter and talking about poop and bodily fluids at the dinner table isn't out of the question.

10. Sex.

Not saying you can't have one without the other but after a day of screaming kids, hair pulling, being a human jungle gym, cleaning, cooking (because for some reason humans need to eat all damned day), laundry, and most likely minimal sleep, you could use a boost at the end of the night. That 2 glass frisky feeling.....am I right? 

A letter to my children

For you,

There are so many things that I want to teach you in life.

There are the common milestones like crawling, walking, talking, riding a bike, writing, and reading etc. but those aren't the ones I am referring to in this very moment.  I guess when I say teach you, I really mean help you, guide you, fight for you, advise you, comfort you, listen to you, and when you really need it simply hold you.

When you are little there are so many tricky things to know and often you call us out on technicalities which is something you don't quite understand yet but it reminds me of the simplicity in things. When you are little I will be there to pick you up when you fall, brush the dirt off your knees, and kiss the scrapes and bruises.  I will help you to figure out your "right and left" and your "rights and wrongs", I will help you find the fun in sharing with others and the joy in helping others.  I will encourage to voice your opinion in a mindful manner and never to judge the opinion of others.  I will lead by example in the importance of truth and the practice of silence.  I will help you understand that words are not just words but a combination of strength, emotion, persuasion, and power and to always do your best to use them for good and positive change. Not maliciously.

You will grow in an environment of respect and confidence towards yourself.  You will know that you belong to no one but yourself and that you are the only one who can make decisions about you and your body.  You will know to seek knowledge and education so that you may always make the best decisions for yourself, and if your decisions do not lead you where you wish to be, know to learn from that and just move forward.  You will treat yourself well by taking time for yourself, learning, exploring, adventuring, being healthy and active, experimenting, and loving not only yourself but others.  May you happen to fall from a broken heart, seek what you need to mend it then seek the next to openly and fully give it to, again.  Never let the fear of a broken heart keep you sharing your love and seeking it in return for that is the worlds greatest gift, it is the only thing no one can take from you if you choose so.

I could write for every day of my life, hope to still guide you every day beyond that and never fit in everything I hope for you and wish to teach you.  Let this letter stand as a reminder for myself of how everything I do, shapes who you are.  Let it be a reminder to myself to practice what I preach and most of all how much you have taught me and have yet to teach me in your life time.

Love you,

Mama.